Baywatch

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Jayman · #11 Post by **Jayman** » Tue May 23, 2017 2:11 pm

And another one star from Empire: http://www.empireonline.com/movies/baywatch/review/

Currently 9% on Rotten Tomatoes.

stuartboy · #12 Post by **stuartboy** » Tue May 23, 2017 10:53 pm

Ok so I caught this tonight. Went in with very low expectations and was somewhat surprised that I was entertained. Amused though would be a huge exaggeration. Barely a titt(er) in Edinburgh though.
I have to say that substitute the title for something completely different, eg "Lifeguard", and this could be a mediocre stand alone movie, similar to Zaccariah Efron's other efforts. Maybe call it "Beaverwatch" and have it a parody of Baywatch (which at times it did try to be).

Would I p*y? Nup! Would I b*y the DVD? Nup.
Didn't hate and didn't walk.

Didn't really understand the cameos.
Didn't understand some of the language.
What does "Examine his taint for evidence of needle marks" mean?
What on earth was that word they used for the drugs (presumed crystal meth)?

4/10

Jayman · #13 Post by **Jayman** » Tue May 23, 2017 11:11 pm

stuartboy wrote:Didn't really understand the cameos.
Didn't understand some of the language.
What does "Examine his taint for evidence of needle marks" mean?

Spoiler

Show

David Hasselhoff & Pamela Anderson played (respectively) The Rock and Kelly Rohrbach's roles in the TV show.

"Taint" is slang for the crotch area typically located between the (pardon my French) nuts and the asshole, though it is more commonly used with regards to females than males. Presumably this is a popular spot for injecting drugs. God knows why?

raj101 · #14 Post by **raj101** » Tue May 23, 2017 11:14 pm

Jayman wrote:
stuartboy wrote:Didn't really understand the cameos.
Didn't understand some of the language.
What does "Examine his taint for evidence of needle marks" mean?

Spoiler
Show
David Hasselhoff & Pamela Anderson played (respectively) The Rock and Kelly Rohrbach's roles in the TV show.

"Taint" is slang for the crotch area typically located between the (pardon my French) nuts and the asshole, though it is more commonly used with regards to females than males. Presumably this is a popular spot for injecting drugs. God knows why?

noones going to notice at work if you are a drug user. But not exactly THAT area lol.

stuartboy · #15 Post by **stuartboy** » Wed May 24, 2017 12:08 am

Jayman wrote:
stuartboy wrote:Didn't really understand the cameos.
Didn't understand some of the language.
What does "Examine his taint for evidence of needle marks" mean?

Spoiler
Show
David Hasselhoff & Pamela Anderson played (respectively) The Rock and Kelly Rohrbach's roles in the TV show.

"Taint" is slang for the crotch area typically located between the (pardon my French) nuts and the asshole, though it is more commonly used with regards to females than males. Presumably this is a popular spot for injecting drugs. God knows why?

Sorry. Of course I already knew that. Lol. I meant that I didn't get their roles in this.

Spoiler

Show

The Rock was Mitch, DHs character in proper Baywatch - so who was DH in this? Other than himself?
And was PA just a walk on? She was only in it because they'd put her name in the opening credits!

Ah. You mean perineum. Lol

Still can't place the drug name. Funny language - American!

Jayman · #16 Post by **Jayman** » Wed May 24, 2017 12:17 am

stuartboy wrote:
Jayman wrote:
stuartboy wrote:Didn't really understand the cameos.
Didn't understand some of the language.
What does "Examine his taint for evidence of needle marks" mean?

Spoiler
Show
David Hasselhoff & Pamela Anderson played (respectively) The Rock and Kelly Rohrbach's roles in the TV show.

"Taint" is slang for the crotch area typically located between the (pardon my French) nuts and the asshole, though it is more commonly used with regards to females than males. Presumably this is a popular spot for injecting drugs. God knows why?
Sorry. Of course I already knew that. Lol. I meant that I didn't get their roles in this.
Spoiler
Show
The Rock was Mitch, DHs character in proper Baywatch - so who was DH in this? Other than himself?
And was PA just a walk on? She was only in it because they'd put her name in the opening credits!
Ah. You mean perineum. Lol

Still can't place the drug name. Funny language - American!

Spoiler

Show

Both The Rock and DH were Mitch Buchannon. I seem to recall a scene where they referred to each other as Mitch (it may have been in the end credits sequence). Pamela Anderson reprised her role from Baywatch as that of Casey Jean Parker.

alythonian · #17 Post by **alythonian** » Wed May 24, 2017 7:43 am

Well, that was as entertainingly awful as I Expected! But in a good way! What's load to rubbish, but really really silly, generally badly acted silliness. It was like Carry On baywatch meets Scooby Do!! I'd not p*y, but I was entertained.!

chelle1973 · #18 Post by **chelle1973** » Wed May 24, 2017 8:08 am

I thought this was very funny! High School Musical in that dress made me LOL 7/10

biggins · #19 Post by **biggins** » Wed May 24, 2017 8:32 am

Well what can I say!! The "F" word used consistently and banal humour - just what was expected.

prettyxcool · #20 Post by **prettyxcool** » Wed May 24, 2017 9:37 am

I think I have been watching a different film. I really, really enjoyed this film. Yes, it was corny and it was cheesy, the story was lame and the jokes were lame but aren't the lamest jokes the funniest? They did not take themselves seriously and I loved the way they were taking the mick out of the slo-mo. I laughed out loud throughout, and came away smiling. It was also inspiring. Such a positive and fun film. Save Baywatch! Yeah. 8/10

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