Pirates of the Caribbean On Stranger Tides

[a_person]

Then we heard the terrifying announcement "Have your tickets and ID ready!" The one time I haven't got tickets in my name and they want ID! I feverishly thought what ejwrank would do and wavered between showing ID and when questioned, saying "You didn't say it had to match!" or coming clean, so had my purse in my hand, mind racing - then completely froze and just handed him the ticket printout. And yes, there are miracles, as he never even looked at it nor challenged the missing ID! Phew.

When booking the tickets, I did notice it had a special notice that read that this screening would require ID (as opposed to saying it on the actual ticket).

I have to ask: is Jake Sparrow meant to be irritating?

It's Captain Jack Sparrow!

[valda]

Oh yeah, and I had promised valda to bring her some popcorn so got there with a bag full (5 popcorns that was) and she never showed up, giving me some lame excuse about it raining!
OH kept telling me to give the popcorn to complete strangers but I resisted, LOL.

honest where I was it was starting to spit with rain. Anyway I wouldn't haave messaged asking for popcorn would I? I had a bag full of sandwiches ready for the film an all

[TheyCallMeMrGlass]

Oh yeah, and I had promised valda to bring her some popcorn so got there with a bag full (5 popcorns that was) and she never showed up, giving me some lame excuse about it raining!
OH kept telling me to give the popcorn to complete strangers but I resisted, LOL.

honest where I was it was starting to spit with rain. Anyway I wouldn't haave messaged asking for popcorn would I? I had a bag full of sandwiches ready for the film an all

5 POPCORN BAGS!!!? what an earth are you trying to do to Valda, steady on with those, they were toffee popcorn too, packed up with sugar...very tasty too though, even I couldnt help munching into it on thursday

But er take it easy on the the popcorn I know its the cinema treat and its great but you girls see 5 films a week!

[jem&theholograms]

Gah the dreaded ID check1 It's always on the occasions where tickets are from kind FMUK-ers, typical. Luckily I just aid, er no I don't have ID and they let us in, was mortified as I brought a friend and would've hated for them to have had a wasted trip. Seems they didn't actually care much about ID so what was the point? Glad to have gotten in though, especially after the escalator nonsense Beate mentioned, hope no one got hurt.

Having read this thread prior to the film, my expectations were pretty low, so actually enjoyed it more than I thought I would, as a silly bit of Sunday fluff. There was actually more plot than I thought there would be! (though this may be affected by watching a completely crap backwardsly plotted film last night which made POTC seem positively oscar worthy). So all in all not a bad Sunday afternoon film from me, like Johnny Depp as Jack Sparrow, though thought Penelope Cruz wasn't made as much of us of as I was expecting, was looking forward to her role. Crap 3D for the last scenes was annoying - 6/10 from me

[shmile]

Oh yeah, and I had promised valda to bring her some popcorn so got there with a bag full (5 popcorns that was) and she never showed up, giving me some lame excuse about it raining!
OH kept telling me to give the popcorn to complete strangers but I resisted, LOL.

honest where I was it was starting to spit with rain. Anyway I wouldn't haave messaged asking for popcorn would I? I had a bag full of sandwiches ready for the film an all

wow sounded like it would have been a mega feast in that cinema

[valda]

yeah that does sound a bit mad. I would have eaten one lot of sandwiches on the train before and one after. Not in the cinema, honest

[Beate]

Oh yeah, and I had promised valda to bring her some popcorn so got there with a bag full (5 popcorns that was) and she never showed up, giving me some lame excuse about it raining!
OH kept telling me to give the popcorn to complete strangers but I resisted, LOL.

honest where I was it was starting to spit with rain. Anyway I wouldn't haave messaged asking for popcorn would I? I had a bag full of sandwiches ready for the film an all

5 POPCORN BAGS!!!? what an earth are you trying to do to Valda, steady on with those, they were toffee popcorn too, packed up with sugar...very tasty too though, even I couldnt help munching into it on thursday

But er take it easy on the the popcorn I know its the cinema treat and its great but you girls see 5 films a week!

Erm... back into your own thread, please, Glassy.

[Beate]

Wow. What a huge pile of nonsensical crap this is. There are so many plot holes, I'm left wondering if it was actually a Swiss production. What drove me nuts? Of the top of my head...
[spoiler]1. Jack, previously unmentioned father (according to my girl, I've not seen any of the first three), magically turns up at just the right moment to save his son and then just as abruptly disappears without further mention.
2. Who exactly was fooled by Penelope Cruz's costume? Did no one get a clear look at her or speak to her?
3. What exactly were Angelica's true motives? Was she really that upset to not have a father? If she's actually that blind to his betrayal of her, doesn't that make her character more pathetic than anything?
4. And was she in a convent? What?
5. Blackbeard is a voodoo witch-doctor wizard?
6. How he "zombify" people?
7. How does he shrink the ships to fit them into the bottle?
8. Wouldn't the balance of Ponce De Leon's ship been thrown off by Geoffrey Rush being there on his own waiting for Depp to turn up?
9. What kind of ridiculous crap was that? A ship lodged there for 200 years could be so easily disturbed?
10. Depp's escape from being tied to the palm tree was intelligence insulting. So the fronds... just forget about those.
11. The vampire-like mermaids? Okay, creative licence, but that who deal with the missionary, who just wouldn't die was so unnecessary.
12. And what becomes of him? How does that work? I have a feeling the scriptwriters have no idea either.
13. What was the bore about? What it a metaphor for the film?
14. Soooooooo, Jack led the English to the fountain first?
15. Somehow everyone makes it up into the spring... the English, the Spanish and Blackbeard's crew. I was waiting for the King of England, Keith Richard's, Keira Knightley and Orlando Bloom to all turn up too.
16. Why the hell would Blackbeard's crew, consisting mainly of those involved in the mutiny, fight against the English on his behalf?
17. The entire Jack-Angelica relationship is sloppy, one gaping hole.
18. The voodoo doll just happens to wash up at Angelica's feet? Ugh.[/spoiler]

Despite the film-makers throwing everything and the kitchen sink into this mess of a plot, it still managed to be totally boring. It all looked beautiful and Geoffrey Rush was great in his role, but everything else was pretty lifeless and surprisingly unfunny. Keith Richards gets the best line and my favourite part was Jack hacking at the ground with his sword after being tripped up. Depp pretty much phones his performance in and it all feels uninspired and directionless.

Going in, I figured this wasn't going to be a cinematic masterpiece, but I thought it'd be harmless fun. Instead it's insulting in it's stupidity as it drags on and on. If I wasn't already eager for the film to end, the 3D imploded at the West End Vue and it wasn't watchable with the glasses for the final 10 minutes. Without the glasses, it looked fine, save for the fuzzy backgrounds and outreached swords. The film is another perfect example of the pointlessness of 3D, which is no surprise on that end. I am still surprised by just how bad this was. All I was hoping for was some good fun and instead I'm left wishing to have my two hours back. 5.5/10 (mostly thanks to Geoffrey Rush and the design of Blackbeard's ship)

LOL, I have to agree with all points made.

[Beate]

I have to ask: is Jake Sparrow meant to be irritating?

It's Captain Jack Sparrow!

Yeah, I don't know where "Jake" came from but why was he so irritating? I am just watching film number 1 and he isn't that bad in it. In fact, that film is miles better than number 4!

[TheyCallMeMrGlass]

Wow. What a huge pile of nonsensical crap this is. There are so many plot holes, I'm left wondering if it was actually a Swiss production. What drove me nuts? Of the top of my head...
[spoiler]1. Jack, previously unmentioned father (according to my girl, I've not seen any of the first three), magically turns up at just the right moment to save his son and then just as abruptly disappears without further mention.
2. Who exactly was fooled by Penelope Cruz's costume? Did no one get a clear look at her or speak to her?
3. What exactly were Angelica's true motives? Was she really that upset to not have a father? If she's actually that blind to his betrayal of her, doesn't that make her character more pathetic than anything?
4. And was she in a convent? What?
5. Blackbeard is a voodoo witch-doctor wizard?
6. How he "zombify" people?
7. How does he shrink the ships to fit them into the bottle?
8. Wouldn't the balance of Ponce De Leon's ship been thrown off by Geoffrey Rush being there on his own waiting for Depp to turn up?
9. What kind of ridiculous crap was that? A ship lodged there for 200 years could be so easily disturbed?
10. Depp's escape from being tied to the palm tree was intelligence insulting. So the fronds... just forget about those.
11. The vampire-like mermaids? Okay, creative licence, but that who deal with the missionary, who just wouldn't die was so unnecessary.
12. And what becomes of him? How does that work? I have a feeling the scriptwriters have no idea either.
13. What was the bore about? What it a metaphor for the film?
14. Soooooooo, Jack led the English to the fountain first?
15. Somehow everyone makes it up into the spring... the English, the Spanish and Blackbeard's crew. I was waiting for the King of England, Keith Richard's, Keira Knightley and Orlando Bloom to all turn up too.
16. Why the hell would Blackbeard's crew, consisting mainly of those involved in the mutiny, fight against the English on his behalf?
17. The entire Jack-Angelica relationship is sloppy, one gaping hole.
18. The voodoo doll just happens to wash up at Angelica's feet? Ugh.[/spoiler]

Despite the film-makers throwing everything and the kitchen sink into this mess of a plot, it still managed to be totally boring. It all looked beautiful and Geoffrey Rush was great in his role, but everything else was pretty lifeless and surprisingly unfunny. Keith Richards gets the best line and my favourite part was Jack hacking at the ground with his sword after being tripped up. Depp pretty much phones his performance in and it all feels uninspired and directionless.

Going in, I figured this wasn't going to be a cinematic masterpiece, but I thought it'd be harmless fun. Instead it's insulting in it's stupidity as it drags on and on. If I wasn't already eager for the film to end, the 3D imploded at the West End Vue and it wasn't watchable with the glasses for the final 10 minutes. Without the glasses, it looked fine, save for the fuzzy backgrounds and outreached swords. The film is another perfect example of the pointlessness of 3D, which is no surprise on that end. I am still surprised by just how bad this was. All I was hoping for was some good fun and instead I'm left wishing to have my two hours back. 5.5/10 (mostly thanks to Geoffrey Rush and the design of Blackbeard's ship)

LOL, I have to agree with all points made.

Funniest review Soon! Well said if a little too harsh but I actually agree with every point made, I'm just slightly more forgiving. The film is a mjor dissapointment though.

5 POPCORN BAGS!!!? what an earth are you trying to do to Valda, steady on with those, they were toffee popcorn too, packed up with sugar...very tasty too though, even I couldnt help munching into it on thursday

But er take it easy on the the popcorn I know its the cinema treat and its great but you girls see 5 films a week!

Erm... back into your own thread, please, Glassy.

Oh yeah, forgot...but still...5 popcorn bags!