A Joke for Today

[michelleans]

police raided Kermit the frogs lily pad last night and found hundres of pictures of miss piggy in the nude.
they say it was the worst case of frogs porn they had ever seen

[michelleans]

i just b*ght 2 tickets for an elvis tribute act on an automated telephone system...
i ihad to press 1 for the money 2 for the show

[raj101]

i just b*ght 2 tickets for an elvis tribute act on an automated telephone system...
i ihad to press 1 for the money 2 for the show

hey baby, i hate pressing buttons. thats a little less conversation, and a little more action.

[Razam]

A pair of convicted killers in a California prison exchanged wedding vows Monday. The two promised to love, cherish, & obey each other 'til death sentence do they part.

[Razam]

A tired traveler pulls into a hotel around midnight. Very tired after a long day's trip he asks the clerk for a single room. As the clerk fills out the paperwork, the man notices a gorgeous woman sitting in the lobby. He tells the clerk to wait while he disappears into the lobby. After a minute he comes back, with the girl on his arm.

Lying to the hotel clerk, he says, "Fancy meeting my 'wife' here. I'll need a double room for the night."

The next morning, he comes to settle his bill, and finds the amount to be over £1,500.

"What's the meaning of this?" he yells at the clerk. "I've only been here for one night!"

"Yes," sniffs the clerk, "but your 'wife' has been here for three weeks!"

[ramaloo]

Hi everyone
Have a good laugh:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sekLEG8xsOs
Hope you like this

[biggins]

Scroll your mouse over the guys head in this link - I don't know how they do it.

http://www.selfcontrolfreak.com/slaan.html

[Sunny Saver]

Quote of the Day

Woman's Quote of the Day:

"Men are like fine wine. They all start out like grapes, and it's our job to stomp on them and keep them in the dark until they mature into something with which you'd like to have dinner with."

Men's Counter-Quote of the Day:

"Women are like fine wine. They all start out fresh, fruity and intoxicating to the mind and then turn full-bodied with age until they go all sour and vinegary and give you a headache."

[cinefila1]

A little old man shuffled slowly into an ice cream parlour and pulled himself slowly, painfully, up onto a stool. After catching his breath he ordered a banana split. The waitress asked kindly, "Crushed nuts?" "No,"he replied, "arthritis.

[aasha]

A man walks into a hamburger shop and orders a regular meal. Later, the waitress brings his meal to him. He takes a bite out of it, and notices there's a small hair in the hamburger. He begins yelling frantically at the waitress, "Waitress, there's a hair in my hamburger! I demand to see what is going on!"

So, the waitress takes him back where the cook is and to his demise, he sees the cook take the meat patty and flatten it under his arm pit. He says, "That's disgusting!"

Then the waitress says, "You think that's disgusting you should see him make donuts."


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